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Wednesday, April 29, 2015


My mother always tell me, to marry a man that loves you.. and not the other way round.

Sounds familiar? Instead, we always end up with the one who breaks our heart. Why? The answer is excitement. That's why. We have been embedded in our head that 'Tall, Dark and Handsome' is what we call desirable men. First, the looks and everything else second. 

When I was a little girl, I love to watch fairy-tales. Always pretending that I was a princess trapped in a tower, waiting for my knight-in- shining armour to rescue me. Always have this notion that when I grew up, there will be this handsome man love me forever and ever. Just like in romantic stories...And they live happily ever after. WRONG! After 38 years of living, I am kind of sure that kind of fairy-tale love does not exist. Where did we go wrong? We are fools on love. Fools that fall in love. Now, after realising it, we have to pick ourselves back, brush off any debris and try to put on our best smile for the world to see that we are alright.

Do you believe in love-at-first sight? I do.. and I'm a woman. Being a woman, we are attracted to nice, cute, pretty things. That's why we have more than a pair of shoes, handbag, clothes etc. To be honest, women drool at men too. We just don't cat-called them. We do it discreetly. Am I right?

Physical attraction comes a long way since in our cave-day. The aborigines associate women physical appearance as the symbol of fertility. Hence, it stays to date. The problem is, when men are Tall, Dark and Handsome, they tend to use their charm in the wrong way. To get more conquest. Be it married or bachelor. Pious or wild. Only the wild we expect them to be. It's the pious one that we have to be careful about. Watch out for the ones with innocent-looking appearance. Boys will be boys.

Today, we have social media to thank for. Thank for finding our soulmates, or break up relationships. Finding a soulmate via the net is always risky. Be aware.. be very aware. When women in search of a relationship, we usually fall for the ones who can sweep us off our feet..someone who can charm us..
 Often, women wear their hearts on their sleeves. And somehow men can smell this vulnerable state from far. I don't know why, men just know when we are lonely. Probably from the way we talk. But lately I noticed that it ain't matter whether you are available or not, men will still try their luck. Available means you're not taken/married. More and more affairs involves married or what the public sees as VERY married couple. Take facebook for instance, I find that most women projects that they are the happiest married lady on earth, conveniently leave out the bad part. Showing off good times, happy pictures of them with their partners/spouse. And sadlly, most of these ladies are either in denial or totally clueless about their partner / spouse's affair. I have had experience chatting and liking married or very married men. Of course I was single at that time. The ones that are married, were very charming, know what to say and how to say. Very often than not, we tend to fall for them. The more naughty they are the more we fall for them. Most bad boys know how to have us around their fingers. Offering empathy, caling us terms of endearments, showing that they are very concern of our well-being, giving out affectionns, joke around and most important of all - not boring. 

It is safer for us to marry someone who loves us, chase after us and not the other way round. Coz believe me, when they already have us, we are at their mercy. Giving all of us and expecting the same from them. Especially when you have children, not working and body began to expand. Your husband go to work, wearing crisp office shirt and pants with tie or coat. He sees beautifully dressed ladies at work, mingling with them. What he sees at work is ladies with an hour or so of make ups and clothes try-outs. Being men, no matter how loyal they are to their wives, they enjoy socialising around these beautiful ladies at work. Whether they take it to another level, that is what worry us. If we turn the table around, say we work in the office and our husbands are house-husbands. Looking at him at home in their unruly hair and attire, smelling like smelly cat.. or handsomely dressed men in the office. Of course we do enjoy being around these groomly office colleagues. It's just human nature.. 
So becareful ladies.. is it safe for me to say that we have to set our minds that we don't own our husbands. If you love someone set them free and if he comes back you know he's yours? Can we settle for that or not? That is the question i posed. 
Til we meet again, take care for now. I will continue writing about this only if there are request for it. Write to me.. tell me something. Love, Lady Lara

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